6.41 Uncertain

Ellen just sat circled up on the bed wondering what she should do. She loved Art but when he yelled at her over the use of the pill, it concerned her a great deal. 

Ellen like most young girls wanted a family but Ellen wanted to get to know Art and then maybe move in together, yes marriage would be nice but it wasn’t essential not for Ellen anyway. When Art insisted that he’d made his commitment by bonding with her that didn’t sit well.

Ellen wasn’t questioning how she felt about Art but was now questioning the way he was treating her. Ellen had to admit there were times she loved his dominant side and there were other times she hated it like now. A few questions that sprung to mind were why wouldn’t he let her go with him to babysit the twins? Why could they only have sex when he wanted it? Why was he expecting her to dress a certain way and finally the one that she was most uncomfortable with was, why didn’t he want her on the pill? 

Ellen wanted to be a Mum one day but not yet and if she fell pregnant now, would he even stick around at this stage or was it a case of I got you pregnant, now deal with it. This was the type of guys she knew from back home and she didn’t like this side of him.

Ellen felt alone and isolated because apart from a few brief meeting with his father William and his girlfriend Victoria it felt like Art was trying to keep her away from his family and she really needed to talk to someone before this all became too much.

Ellen jumped when there was a knock at the door, she slowly walked over towards the door, took a deep breath then opened it. 

She was surprised to see a lady standing there and said, “Hi can I help you?” Dawn smiled and re-introduced herself and watched Ellen step aside to let her in.

“Ellen, are you alright because you seem preoccupied?” Ellen fell back in the chair and said almost in a whisper, “I’m fine…” then she stopped before the tears started. Dawn kept looking at her and replied, “We were concerned about you because every time we ask after you, Art says you are busy. It’s just we are used to seeing all the other girlfriends but we don’t see you.”

“I’m ok.” Dawn wasn’t buying the speech with a fake happy tone that was too obvious. “Ellen if something is bothering you, well you can talk to me.”

“I can’t because you are Art’s step-grandmother…”

“True but I can see you are upset so talk to me, please.” Ellen knew she needed to open up so decided to take a chance, “I’m thinking of leaving Art…” Dawn was stunned and asked carefully, “Why?” Ellen was trying to find the words and just blurted them out, “At first I thought if I didn’t do what he wanted he’d leave me. What I mean by that was when he asked me to pick somewhere to go on a date, I’d just say you pick because I thought he wouldn’t like what I wanted to do. I mean I’d hurt him when we first met, I just thought he would leave me, stupid right?” Dawn went to say something but Ellen continued without taking a breather, “Then he says things like, I want you now and I don’t argue, I just let him have me even if I don’t want it but he is getting worse. He wouldn’t let me babysit with him. He wanted me to cook different food even though I was already cooking. I’m changing my clothes to suit his needs and wants and now he refuses to let me on the pill saying nature must take its course and I should be grateful as he’s shown his commitment by this bonding.”

“Stop,” Dawn shouted. Ellen went quiet again and it was now Dawn’s turn to speak, “Are you telling me he is controlling you and you don’t want him too?”

“I liked it at first…”

“Did you ever discuss this?” Ellen shook her head.

“First of all, the pill is your choice and not his. It does sound like Art is taking this control thing too far and I have to ask but has he hit you?”

“No.”

“Have you refused sex by saying no and Art force himself on you anyway?” Ellen shook her head again and said, “I don’t say anything, what does that count as?” Dawn was taken aback and said, “Ellen, I think you and Art need to talk. Plus I want to kill him for making you feel like this especially about the pill. However you do need to let your voice be heard and be honest with him and then if he continues to behave like this then you know he is wrong and then you can leave knowing you did everything you could.”

Dawn left but not before telling Ellen that she could come to the house anytime if she wanted to talk.

Ellen had packed a few bags and rang her Dad saying she wanted to come and visit. When Sam asked if Art was coming with her, Ellen didn’t respond so Sam didn’t push things over the phone.

Art walked in and saw the bags and asked, “Where are you going?” Ellen just stood there and said, “I need to put space between us.” Art lost his temper, “Space…everything is fine with us and you are not leaving.”

“Art please, I’m not leaving you but I need space to think things over.”

“Like what?”

“Why won’t you like me go on the pill?” Art yelled, “I have my reasons…” 

Ellen was terrified of speaking up but pushed through her anxiety and replied, “What are your reasons then?”

“You are human and not a vampire like me,” Ellen was stunned but listened to Art, “If by the time we want a baby it may be too late and then I’ll never be a father.” Ellen had to ask, “Where has this come from?”

“My parents had tried for years and when my Mum had a test she was told no kids. They were devastated but by some miracle they finally found out they were expecting me. So I decided a long time ago no pill for the girl I date.”

“You can’t force a baby on us just because of what happened with your parents.” Art couldn’t understand why Ellen was upset and said firmly, “You aren’t leaving so go and unpack those bags.” 

Ellen tried to walk past Art but he pinned her to wall, “I said you aren’t going anywhere. I am not having another female leave me.” In tears Ellen begged, “Please don’t be like this…” 

Art responded by kissing her and said, “I know you like this and if I pushed you more you would be very willing when I took you to the bedroom.”

“Art you aren’t listening to me. Yes you are right if you pushed, I’d be very willing but I want to be able to have fun during sex but there is none. So please let me go and think about what I have said.” 

Art stepped back and just looked at Ellen as she ran from the apartment leaving her clothes behind.